We had always talked about adoption as a future goal for us. On our second date we said we'd have two of our own and adopt two more someday. As the years passed, and we had our two children, we realized how expensive adoption was and put it to the back burner. It became more of a dream than a goal..."I'd like to win the lottery..." "I'd love to go to Spain..." "I'd love to adopt a child..."
January 2010 -
Our adoption journey began in January 2010, after the earthquake in Haiti. We were so moved by the reports of all the children who had lost their parents, their homes, their everything! We decided it was time to really look into adoption again and see what we could find. I remember we were driving in the car and I googled "adoption Arizona" on Josh's cell phone. The first thing that came up was a link to a local adoption agency, Building Arizona Families. The site described the different types of adoptions available, some of which we hadn't heard of. One type was Interstate Adoption; adopting children out of the foster system within the United States. This, being the most affordable type, was what we decided to explore first.
We called the agency the next day and asked everything we could think of. Turns out this type of adoption is very affordable and that there are LOTS of beautiful, amazing, loving children in foster homes all over the country, just waiting to find their forever families. We talked it out as a couple and as a family, and decided that we wanted to change someone's life, and in doing so, change our own.
We called the agency the next day and asked everything we could think of. Turns out this type of adoption is very affordable and that there are LOTS of beautiful, amazing, loving children in foster homes all over the country, just waiting to find their forever families. We talked it out as a couple and as a family, and decided that we wanted to change someone's life, and in doing so, change our own.
February 2010 -
In February, we had our first visit with our caseworker. She came to our home, went over the entire process with us, let us ask questions and inspected our home. She left us with a lot of paperwork to complete and a list of our next steps.
The next step in getting us matched with a child was to have a completed Home Study. We had to get our fingerprints taken, have background checks done, provide several personal references, and each write autobiographies. (That was quite a journey into self awareness!!) This took weeks to complete and then several more weeks to have the courts review. In that time we had another visit from our caseworker, to interview us and our children, and inspect our home again.
March 2010 –
Next step, classes!! Another part of our preparation was completing ten weeks of classroom training. We talked about some of the reasons kids come into care, what they may be feeling, how they may behave as a result and the best ways to cope. Some nights were easier than others. It was very emotional for me to hear about what some of them had been through. It sent me on a journey through my childhood and my sense of self. It made me question a lot of things and made me stronger as a woman and a mother. It made me even more certain that I wanted to adopt.
Next step, classes!! Another part of our preparation was completing ten weeks of classroom training. We talked about some of the reasons kids come into care, what they may be feeling, how they may behave as a result and the best ways to cope. Some nights were easier than others. It was very emotional for me to hear about what some of them had been through. It sent me on a journey through my childhood and my sense of self. It made me question a lot of things and made me stronger as a woman and a mother. It made me even more certain that I wanted to adopt.
June 2010 –
Our classes ended the first week of June. We felt like college graduates, ready to hit the road running! Our next step was the hardest…waiting. We had to wait for the court to grant us our Certification to Adopt before we could inquire on any children, but that didn’t stop us for from searching. We created a spreadsheet, and started spending an hour a day searching every photolisting we could find from every state. We were shocked by how many waiting children there were out there! Then on June 9th, we got the letter we’d been waiting for! We were so very excited, we inquired on half a dozen kids that day. We began inquiring on about 3-5 kids per week, every week, never hearing much of anything back from anyone. We got the occasional request for our homestudy, and our caseworker would send it out on our behalf. After about three months, we started to get discouraged. We knew it could take a while to get matched, but we were hoping we’d be the exception to the rule.
Our classes ended the first week of June. We felt like college graduates, ready to hit the road running! Our next step was the hardest…waiting. We had to wait for the court to grant us our Certification to Adopt before we could inquire on any children, but that didn’t stop us for from searching. We created a spreadsheet, and started spending an hour a day searching every photolisting we could find from every state. We were shocked by how many waiting children there were out there! Then on June 9th, we got the letter we’d been waiting for! We were so very excited, we inquired on half a dozen kids that day. We began inquiring on about 3-5 kids per week, every week, never hearing much of anything back from anyone. We got the occasional request for our homestudy, and our caseworker would send it out on our behalf. After about three months, we started to get discouraged. We knew it could take a while to get matched, but we were hoping we’d be the exception to the rule.
September 2010 –
Then in September, right after my 30th birthday, we got a call from our caseworker that there was a little boy, 8 months old, here in Arizona, and his caseworker was interested in us as a potential match. We were stunned! They came to us?! We didn’t think that ever happened! We felt like this must be "it: because this just doesn’t happen!! We read his profile and decided that we wanted to move forward. The staffing meeting to select his new family was set for the following week. It was between us and two other families. We were nervous, but also very sure of ourselves. We had faith that things would go in our favor. We didn’t tell very many people, because we were scared to jinx it, but the day of the meeting, we had our close friends and family standing by for the good news. The meeting was supposed to last about two hours, and then it would be another hour for the decision to be made. We waited..and waited and then our caseworker called and said the meeting went well. We definitely had a good shot of getting chosen!! Then we waited and waited…and waited. Hours passed. We called our caseworker, but she hadn’t heard anything yet. Later in the afternoon, we got a call from her, letting us know that the decision had been emailed to her and she was on the road and didn’t get it. The committee selected another family. We were heartbroken, to say the least. I felt like, this was our one shot. I was mad. I felt like God was teasing us. But, God doesn’t work that way. So I strengthened my resolve, kept searching the photo listing and got myself a puppy. <3
December 2010 – By December, we were distracted thinking about Christmas and adoption was on the back burner. We were driving around as a family, listening to Christmas music and looking at lights when Josh’s phone rang. It was our caseworker, and she had exciting news. Another caseworker read our homestudy and was interested in us…for twin baby boys! My heart raced with anticipation as she started describing the boys to me, and then I thought…Josh will never go for this, it’s too much for us. The boys were 16 months old, living here in an Arizona foster home. One was healthy, one was not so fortunate. As a result of extreme child abuse at 10 weeks old, he developed cerebral palsy. He has some paralysis on the left side of his body and is fed through a G-tube in his belly. I told her I needed to talk to Josh and we’d call her back. We took the weekend to think, pray, cry, research and talk about the boys. We really felt God telling us to take the next step, and at least throw our hats in the ring. And so we did…
Then in September, right after my 30th birthday, we got a call from our caseworker that there was a little boy, 8 months old, here in Arizona, and his caseworker was interested in us as a potential match. We were stunned! They came to us?! We didn’t think that ever happened! We felt like this must be "it: because this just doesn’t happen!! We read his profile and decided that we wanted to move forward. The staffing meeting to select his new family was set for the following week. It was between us and two other families. We were nervous, but also very sure of ourselves. We had faith that things would go in our favor. We didn’t tell very many people, because we were scared to jinx it, but the day of the meeting, we had our close friends and family standing by for the good news. The meeting was supposed to last about two hours, and then it would be another hour for the decision to be made. We waited..and waited and then our caseworker called and said the meeting went well. We definitely had a good shot of getting chosen!! Then we waited and waited…and waited. Hours passed. We called our caseworker, but she hadn’t heard anything yet. Later in the afternoon, we got a call from her, letting us know that the decision had been emailed to her and she was on the road and didn’t get it. The committee selected another family. We were heartbroken, to say the least. I felt like, this was our one shot. I was mad. I felt like God was teasing us. But, God doesn’t work that way. So I strengthened my resolve, kept searching the photo listing and got myself a puppy. <3
December 2010 – By December, we were distracted thinking about Christmas and adoption was on the back burner. We were driving around as a family, listening to Christmas music and looking at lights when Josh’s phone rang. It was our caseworker, and she had exciting news. Another caseworker read our homestudy and was interested in us…for twin baby boys! My heart raced with anticipation as she started describing the boys to me, and then I thought…Josh will never go for this, it’s too much for us. The boys were 16 months old, living here in an Arizona foster home. One was healthy, one was not so fortunate. As a result of extreme child abuse at 10 weeks old, he developed cerebral palsy. He has some paralysis on the left side of his body and is fed through a G-tube in his belly. I told her I needed to talk to Josh and we’d call her back. We took the weekend to think, pray, cry, research and talk about the boys. We really felt God telling us to take the next step, and at least throw our hats in the ring. And so we did…
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